expectations.

in the midst of mugging and prepping,
i was just thinking,
if i can ever meet up to them.
my own expectations, and other's expectations of me.

suddenly it dawned upon me,
the self-worth issue.
insofar as the bible puts it,
the our worth is in Christ alone.

but its interesting to note that, we're placed in dis world,
succumbed to powers and opinions OF dis world,
at the same time reminding ourselves
that our treasures are of somewhere else.

and even more interestingly,
even christians would sometimes base worth
on a set of transcripts and a spanking resume.
or a good life is not just in Christ alone, but job too.

apart from reminding ourselves when need be,
that out treasures and worth are not of dis world,
how else should we be reminded or encouraged.
what other heavenly benchmarks are there?

oh wait,
aren't we the ones who came up wif benchmarks or yardsticks?
let me try to put it together again, properly dis time.
what other milestones in our lives encourages us of our faith?

for paul, he was credible not because of his phD equivalent,
but because he was appointed to be the apostle of Christ.
dis is evident in all his letters in the new testament,
where his salutations flaunt apostleship, not scholarship.

for david, solomon and all other god-appointed kings of old testament,
their worth was easily identified wif their empire.
for david, he was accredited the title 'man after God's own heart'.
for solomon, he was allowed 1000 ladies married to him and his wisdom.

i'd like to talk abt david a lil more here.
he was given the abovementioned title,
simply because of his God-abiding lifestyle..
for a detailed analysis, refer to zing's blog.

but i guess it would be pretty safe to assume and conclude
that him being a king, a king of a nation in dis world,
is not so much of his own endeavor,
but because he obeyed God, and in turn was blessed richly.

the world may see him as a man of stature,
but we all know david has an intimate r/s wif God.
so what happens here is that,
its an inward out process, always has been.

david had a goal in mind,
to please God's heart and ultimately finishing the race.
but God honoured david by giving him authority on earth,
not coz he deserves it, but coz He knows david can handle it.

back to my fear of letting fatigue seep in,
i guess i shan't hold my expectations too tightly.
coz i know i commit them to God,
and i wanna honour Him for all that i do.

in terms of academics,
dis is what God gave me,
and where He placed me.
but i'm sure He'll use me in ways i cannot see.

and i shall not live to fulfill expectations,
but live to please His heart.
easier said than done,
but its easier knowing that i'm doing to honour Him!

Lord, i give You my life, my studies, my career.
these are temporal goals and aspirations,
Lord, i'm more interested in what You think of me.
Father, take me, use me.