inadequacy.

"Jesus told peter to mind his own business, when he tried to compare his life and trials with john's"

that was my pm on MSN,
in the morning.
and when den suddenly,
zing asked "did He?"

being trained in quoting wif contextual accuracy,
zing and i know that we ought to be backed up,
by the word of God.
it need not be the exact words, but at least the idea.

so confidently, i told him "yep. wait, i go find the verse."
coz i know confidently,
that that was something that kept me in check,
and encouraged me whenever life seems to be unfair.

my basic bible knowledge tells me
that could be found in the gospel.
so i did the biblegateway search..
to my disbelief, there was no such reference.

adamant abt it,
i decided to go through the verses one by one.
starting from matthew 10,
knowing that it happened somewhere during Jesus' ministries.

so i read intently, patiently, word by word.
i finished matthew, DON'T HAVE!
and so i began to quiver in my heart.
thinking to myself, "really don't haf meh?"

so i took heart,
and went on to look in the book of mark.
starting from mark 5,
intently, patiently, word by word. DON'T HAVE!

dis time i was really afraid and upset.
so i decided to take my pm out..
if really don't haf, the last thing i want to do
is to stumble other pple.

but i continued looking from luke.
at the same time,
i asked pauline,
if she has heard abt dis passage before.

so trying tirelessly,
explaining to pauline what the context was.
she told me,
"oh have! that is one of my fav passages. wait, i go find!"

wah, i tell you..
when pauline pasted to me the passage,
it was found in JOHN 21:15-23!!
the last book of the gospel in biblical chronology..

but dis small exercise showed me something.
how weak i was in my bible knowledge..
how faithless i was,
easily toppled during testings.

like as pauline agrees wif me,
the bible is only a story book,
if we read it for bedtime stories.
nothing else.

the bible is the word and breath of God,
if we read it, and practise it in our lives.
and in times of doubts,
memory verses really reinstates our faith.

what is quiet time to you?
is it a 'peaceful' time in the day or night,
where we read the devotionals and verses allocated?
or a time of reflection?

most of us would think that quiet time is for
a time of request, or a time of confide.
but i suppose i would think not..
it is a time of communication.

where i wait upon the Lord,
sometimes i may start off by telling Him abt my day.
but i'm reminded that i ought to talk to God!
communication is 2-way for a reason..

and i've seen the importance of memory verses after today,
if i'm tested by the world or the devil,
how will i stand!
i own a bible, but am i equipped wif it?

sheer determination and self-control
would not supercede
the insights and understandings of God's word!
nvr shall it be..

conviction cannot be achieved by someone else's experience.
conviction can only be worked through the Holy Spirit!
and if we don't communicate wif the Holy Spirit,
we can forget abt being convicted just by reading bedtime stories.