complacent?

my friend couldn't believe i failed.
he was in sucha disbelief,
that i almost hung up coz i'm tired of convincing him
that i really failed.

some of you know,
that i love to run.
i would run even if i don't haf ippt.
i just run as and when!

and when i failed,
i could almost hear a voice creeping in me.
"do you see it now?"
my complacency..

it reminds me of nothing else,
but my walk wif God.
and its a scary thought,
but i'm thankful its still not too late.

i won't be surprised if 'good and nice' pple
are denied entry to Heaven on Judgement Day.
it would be shocking,
but i won't be surprised.

i thought to myself,
i've ran so much.
even if i puke,
i could at least get a pass!

how many times, how many pple,
think by gaining entry to Heaven,
its abt hardwork and perseverance,
and even consistency?

but the Lord said so clearly,
we're justified by faith, not by works.
i'm not saying that we shouldn't run and train,
and just take 2.4 wif faith!

but because of dis epic failure,
it reminded me of my faith.
i won't deny,
there were so many times i chose to 'work' for salvation.

but think again,
would God tell me,
"i'm sorry, i don't know you.."
even after so much 'church work' i've done?

it drove home a point in my tired mind,
that its abt time i give up on works.
not that they're not good,
but it shouldn't take precedent in our lives!

i can be a good singer,
i can be a good actor,
i can devote so much so much time to church,
in the name of 'serving the Lord'.

but am i really serving the Lord?
or serving myself?
to get known in church,
to get recognized for my 'efforts' in church?

what my father said was right,
and it reminded me of 'real ministry'.
ministry doesn't start in 3rd world nations,
ministry doesn't start elsewhere but our homes.

and i'm almost proven a stumbling block!
like it or not, non-christians don't care what you do in church,
they care what you do outside church!
and i almost fell short.

because of dis failure,
i'm grateful that i can be woken up from my complacency.
both in running and in my walk wif my Father..
sometimes i really think i take Him for granted.

and its a good check within,
to re-align myself to Him.
it is very very easy to be complacent or lackadaisical,
but we've to remind each other of the cross!

are we too happy wif our lives?
are we too comfortable wif our lives?
are we too complacent in our walk?
are we taking His cross for granted?