caged-up

i feel like i don't haf time for myself.
everyday is like getting things done,
getting more things done,
and getting things done well.

morning wake up,
go get squeezy in the tuna-canned train.
listen to mp3 and read
"experiencing God"

den get off the train and walk to office
and start work.
calculating accounts,
reading tons and tons of papers.

den lunch time,
go cathedral to spend some well-deserved quiet time
wif God.
and read my proverbs.

den after that super short 1hr,
go back office and start round 2.
dis time wif more frustration,
coz of empty stomach.

den knock off alr.
board the tuna-canned train,
dis time even more crowded,
got no reading space.

if no plans,
eat dinner alone at whitesands,
den go home practice SAT,
and do QT den slp.

if got plans,
go out eat dinner,
go home later and practice SAT,
and do QT den slp later.

everyday is lidat man.
apart from my 1pm-2pm slot,
i'm pretty much spaced out lah!
so tired to read so much and think so long!

SAT is just 3 alphabets,
but it really takes up alot of brain juice and time man.
so much that i don't haf time to watch tv,
or to watch online movies!

suddenly i feel that i've no energy to socialize.
everyday knock off alr,
feel like just going home and practice my SAT
and den haf an earlier night.

but by the time i end up on my bed at 12.30,
i'm alr gone.
i don't even dream anymore!
and before i know it,
i've to go work again!

even if i'm not feeling well,
i've to drag myself out of bed,
coz things are piling up and i'm on probation.
don't wanna let MCs affect my work performance at year end.

am i pushing myself too hard?
or is dis supposed to be the way,
but i've been slacking my life away
for the past few academic years?

nvm, i'll push myself harder.
i really don't wanna screw my exam up in nov!
i've made enough mistakes
and slacked enough by now.

time to be a useful being,
and achieve something for myself.
other than talking abt dreamy love,
time to hit the books and snap back to reality man!

argh, dis is so hard!
coming online has became a temptation for me.
but dis is my only time i relax and socialize.
other than dis, nothing else man!

its only been 3 mths,
but i feel like i've been retaining for 3 yrs.
i wanna be a useful person,
i wanna get into law school..