opportunites?

i've been confused over a few things recently.
one of which is abt friendship.
which i've alr known who to trust and who not to.
so one of which is settled.

but on friendship generally.
haf u got any possessive friends?
not even opp sex.
same gender! and petty..

just wondering why is it so hard to maintain friendships?
i used to disagree wif don,
when he says, "friendships are seasonal"
i just find it so hard to swallow.

but i guess its apparently true.
one day they can tell u dis abt themselves,
another day, u realise their actions just contradicted it.
and u're left to figure it out on your own.

things can never be the same as before,
that i agree.
but things can be as nice and real,
if u put in that extra effort to practice what u preach.

oh well, i wouldn't deny that time change, pple change.
but its just so hard to accept isn't it?
and somedays u're left alone thinking,
when u thought things are going on fine.

i thought i was just being over-sensitive abt it,
but i think sometimes,
we can't reproach ourselves and take all the blame.
sometimes we've to accept the truth.

on a separate note,
i've been advised by one of the counsels
to take a part time law degree.
they say law and engineering is a good mix too.

seems like engineering is a good mix wif everything!
good mix wif law,
good mix wif banking and finance,
good mix wif trading.

but as i'm still deciding on the course to major in,
i must be constantly in check wif my motive.
whether is it for money and glamour,
or is it really my passion.

if u'd ask me if i enjoy what i'm doing now,
i can tell u yes!
apart from the nice clothes and clok clok shoes,
i realise i haf a gift in admin stuff!

liaison, letter drafting,
organising hearings, filing,
checking of the tenses in the letter,
transcripting, and many more i do..

i really enjoy reading the cases too.
how things are actually processed.
what are the proper proceedings of each case,
and the nature of dispute.

but when i read the brochure,
on part time degree in law (LLB)
it says that i cannot be a practitioner in the bar of s'pore.
den study for what right?

i spoke to one of the counsels,
and she told me.
well, u can be a counsel, like me.
or a corporate lawyer..

don't earn as much as those argumentative lawyers,
but u earn a reasonable salary,
u get ur weekends and fixed working hours.
u haf a good balance in life and work!

sounds good to me,
but what happened to my banking goal?
why i wanna be an investment analyst in the first place?
why i prefer the finance sector?

maybe coz of the good salary,
and also coz i wanna help pple around me invest wisely.
and help them earn more money.
live a better life.

argh.
i'm so confused..
so many things to pray abt.
crossroads in life are tough!
but exciting!

oh oh!
and nich tan also mentioned that
uncle ben has intentions to bring
don and i down to main service.
and lead worship.

oh well,
am i ready?
luckily don told uncle ben to hold on first.
not so fast..

what's holding me back?
stage fright?
shy?
see! i told u i'm shy..

oh man!!
all these are may seem small to u huh?
but it matters to me man.
milestones in life.
hahaha!

i just love attending friend's birthdays.
always get good comments.
and it really feels good to be "watched at"
hmm, i should stop all these man!
seriously.