uncertainties.

there are many things in life,
u cannot control..
i'd like to name a few common ones.

why are u feeling like that?
how pple think abt u?
accidents,
change of feelings..

some of these are hurtful,
some of which are slowly eating u up.
some u'll just hafta accept the sad fact.
others u'll just hafta let logic take over ur emotions.

though most of the situations hurt,
coz we're human beings.
we tend to need control over things.
like our own life, own decisions.

and decisions will definitely waver,
coz we are human beings.
and we tend to want the best of both worlds.
but the sad fact is dis,
u're bound to lose some.

what i've observed thru myself so far,
is that i've been holding on to uncertainties.
things that mean alot to me,
yet i've zero control over.

and each step i take,
i take it in view of how i'd hope for it to turn out.
to turn out my way.

but i realised,
that throughout all these thought processes.
i've left God out of the picture.

no doubt my perseverance in prayer,
i still hope that my will be done.
no doubt i commit my all to Him,
dis area at least,
i want it for myself.
coz its dear to me..

and as i evaluate on myself lately,
why the toll on me.
is simply dis..

i've made myself an idol.
as much as it stems from a pure intention,
and a rather sweet one.

unknowingly, i've sinned.
and disappointed my God big time!
and its a reminder that its not all abt me.
its abt Him!

whether i get what i want or not,
its His will.
and since i've committed,
i should honour God.

even if it hurts alot!
i'll hafta honour Him,
simply because He's my Creator.
He knows what's best for me.

at the end of the day,
the ball's still in my court.
do i trust Him enough?